Right About Now, Dick Cheney Is Wishing He Were A Movie Star

Oh, to be exposed and judged. And then to say you don’t care! And then, to have to face down your own mortality with this movie being the last word? That’s got to smart.

“The World According To Dick Cheney,” a Showtime movie. Although I think I already know Dick’s world, having Cheney as a tour guide sounds both horrible and interesting.

Anyway, it’s buzzing everywhere that Dick Cheney really and truly (in case you thought you were hallucinating for eight years) is an asshole. BIG confirm on that.

(Ironically, this makes Dick Cheney a movie star – or a movie’s star. Where’s the love, people? It really is like the 5 stages of grief.)

Two Jackasses Coming Soon to a Theater Near You

Johnny Knoxville of “Jackass” fame, and Arnold Schwarzenegger, also of jackass fame, are a team in this new movie with big guns. From the looks of the marketing, the jackasses battle other, unseen, un-movie-poster-worthy jackasses. I’m guessing the “star” jackasses win.

It hasn’t opened yet. And, no, I won’t be seeing it.

(See also “Arnold the Barbarian“)